The Message
by Agent Rothschild
Summary: What if Raven had not freaked out when Slade had delivered Trigon's message. Well, now you do know. Funny story.


**The Message**

One night, Raven was sitting in her room, reading her book by candlelight. The other Titans had gone to bed already, but Raven had decided to stay up just a _little _bit longer.

Suddenly, a gust of wind ripped open her windows, blowing out all the candles. Though it was pitch black in her room, Raven still tried to finish reading.

Slade stepped through her bedroom windows and walked up to her.

"Hello Raven. I have a message for you," he said, with no response from Raven. She was still reading her book. Slade walked up closer to her.

"Raaaaven, I have a message!!!" Slade said in a whiny OOC voice. He looked over to see what she was reading.

"Can you come back a little bit later Slade? I'm almost done with this chapter," Raven said, still reading.

Slade grabbed her chin in his hand. "Don't think I'm afraid of you. I still have a message to deliver," he said.

"Well, can you hurry up and tell me? I want to finish reading," Raven said, uninterested.

Slade took a deep breath. "Skies will-

"Burn, flesh will turn to stone, the sun will set on my world, never to rise again. Yeah, I know, I've already heard that song before," Raven said sarcasticly.

Slade had wide eyes, and underneath his mask, his mouth was hanging open.

"Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to finish my book," she said, turning around.

Slade was frantic. Why wasn't it working?!

"Wait!" he yelled.

Raven turned back around. Her eye was twitching. "Yes?"

Slade desperately thought of something evil to say.

" You... will destroy your loved ones! Your friends will all die! Your mother's family on earth will perish. You will destroy everything. The library, the pizza place, your neighbor's adorable kitty! You will... You will KILL THE JONAS BROTHERS!!!"

"That's it, I'm ignoring you," Raven said, picking up her forgotten book.

Slade began to break everything within reach in Raven's room, much to her annoyance.

"You're an abomination, your friends never liked you. Your mother never loved you either... that's why you never got that Barbie doll you wanted. Beast Boy never loved you either... he liked Terra more, because men prefer blondes. Or is that just the title of a Marylin Monroe movie?" he rambled.

(Raven's annoyance reaching it's peak in ten, nine, eight...)

"You have no taste in clothes, your haircut is ugly, you're creepy and wierd..."

(Raven's annoyance at it's peak in seven, six, five...)

"Your scary and ugly... nobody likes you..."

Slade began to rip off her clothes until they resembled something like a bikini. All this time, Raven had concentrated on reading her book, but it's kind of hard when a weirdo is trying to undress you even though he thinks you're ugly.

(Four...)

Slade lost his patience.

"Will you stop reading and listen to me?! I'm trying to taumatize you and scare you shitless, but you won't listen and you are _still reading your book!!!"_

(Three...)

"I said STOP READING AND LISTEN TO ME!!!"

(Two...)

Slade summoned a ball of fire into his hands. He pointed it at Raven.

(One...)

And burnt her book.

(Zero.)

Raven turned her head slowly, like someone from a failed exorsism. Her eyes were red, and she looked beyond pissed.

"Heh Heh... maybe I shouldn't have done that," Slade said.

Raven levitated, her black enegy surrounding her.

"AZARATH METRION ZINTHOS!"

"!"

(The next morning)

I'm going out," said Raven.

"Can I come? We can shop and do the painting of nails..."

Raven hastily cut Starfire off. "I'm just going to the library to get a new book."

"Didn't you just buy one yesterday?" asked Cyborg.

"Yeah... but something happened to it."

Beast Boy jumped out of his seat. "Did an alien steal it? Or a robot? Or did Silkie make a nest out of it..." Beast Boy stopped when he saw the WTF? stare Raven was giving him.

"By the way, I heard screaming last night. Did you have a nightmare?" asked Robin.

"Not me..." Raven said mysteriously.

(Slade's lair)

Slade was under his bed, rocking back and forth in fetal position.

"Sir?" he asked.

"What?" replied Trigon.

"Do you have another daughter that needs converting to the dark side?"

"No. Why?"

"Because that one frightens me."

The End

Lol!


End file.
